So we finally had that baby: John Warren, the cutest and happiest one yet. He came at the tail end of May. At ten days overdue, I was anxious and achy and kind of mad. Went to bed on Friday thinking I might have to try induction, then woke up on Saturday in labor. Hurray! It went so smoothly and quickly– with the inevitable pain, but very little fear. I worried my way through Zoe’s birth, and I am so thankful for the courage that God gave me with John.
When I held him for the first time I forgot, at least for a while, the awful things about this pregnancy. All I knew was that a new soul had been safely brought into the world and I was miraculously going to be his mama. I knew that the dark places I had walked during pregnancy had not spoiled my child, that they had not placed any barrier between us or detracted from the love I felt for him. And on the way home from the birth center, I suddenly began to cry, overwhelmed with both joy and disbelief: we had done it. It had been so hard, both the carrying and the delivering of this baby, but we’d come through that wilderness passage and could stop a while in the shade of God’s kindness.